Thursday, August 9, 2007

Long Time, No Interweblog

Well things have been busy here at the chapel. Construction is coming along nicely. The exorcism appeared to be more effective than I expected, but was unfortunately only temporary. The demons conjured by the witch, however, seem to have vanished permanently. I have sent George to investigate.

Following that, I went on a pilgrimage to Our Lady of the Roses Shrine in Bayside, NY. Quite a relaxing place, and I learned so much about the impending apocalypse.

Upon returning to Knoxville, I heard of a meeting of the heretical Knights of Columbus over in Nashiville. So Fr. Heidrich, George, and myself went with the Borgias in their SUV (I should remind you, Vincenzo, that you shouldn't be driving without a license plate). When we arrived, we saw Sir Feeney was already there proslytizing the heathens. Together we passed out flyers I had printed entitled "8,792 Heresies of the Concicular Church." At one point, one of these knights offended Sir Feeney's honor, and was challenged to a duel. Do not let your defeat bother you, Sir Feeney, your opponent was much your elder and thus more experienced.


Sir Rev. Leonard Feeney, HKTTC said...

As anyone who has seen thine truly in battle can inform thee, I could wipe the floor with an entire regiment of KofC heretics if I wanted to.

In the case noted, I let the poor aged soul win so he could have a brief moment of peace before he dies and burns in Hell for eternity. Is it not a teaching of the Truly True Church that when a heretic be near death, we should be more charitable than we would be if he be fully vital?

DigiHairshirt said...

What did he do, Sir Feeney, get you across the head with his Friday Fish Fry spatula?

KofC rules!!

XXXXXX said...

Sir. Feeney,

I was watching the video that our agent in Nashville took of your duel. I think that the lighter weight KofC sword was a great factor. He was able to move his blade slightly faster than you with your broadsword. Might I suggest that you carry a second sword with less weight to it in addition to your main blade.

Agent Smith

Rae said...

Um, I looked at that Spirit of Vatican 2 site (I'm sorry! I'm sorry! ...But hey, I'm already excommunicated, so what's another mortal sin?)

...And they're currently keeping a human brain alive in a jar (and forcing it to somehow experience Julia Roberts movies)!!! Does this call for some sort of public statement--and/or maybe a little bit of violence (Sir Feeney)? Or is everyone waiting for the exorcism to "take"?

Pastor Tyrone of "New Life Awake! Pentecostal church" said...

FOUL PAPISTS! REPENT! I invite you and your SPV2 friends to come to the church where JESUS CHRIST IS LORD!! Amen! Hallejuah!!!

I don't know what sort of Papists you all are, but once a Romanists, always a Romanist! Leave the WHORE OF BABYLON and come into the light of the TRUTH!!! Get rid of your clerical attire and put on the white clothing of full immersion baptism! AMEN! Throw away your Latin books and read the Good News! in the King's English. AMEN!