Friday, March 21, 2008

Finale

That poor organ! Poor, poor organ! Crushed under the stones!

So here is a recap of what happened:

Fr. Heidrich was just lowering the tiara the Borgias brought from Washington, D.C. onto Fr. Chad's head when the FBI arrived. The Borgias pulled out their concealed weapons, including 90 year-old Lucrezia in her wheelchair. Fr. Heidrich pulled out his Mauser from beneath his vestments and ducked behind the throne. Fr. Chad kept on telling everyone named Anathema to sit, but either no one was named Anathema or nobody heard him. Then there was this earthquake, and the walls of the chapel collapsed. The keystone swung violently directly above where Fr. Chad was. The rope suddenly snapped, and the stone hit Fr. Chad on the head. Thank goodness he was wearing that tiara, or he could've gotten hurt badly. Miraculously the tiara didn't even dent!

Fr. Chad is recovering in the hospital. He currently has amnesia, not remembering ever being the Pope or even a priest. He's actually been friendly towards the hospital chaplain, who likes both Latin and the Novus Ordo.

Fr. Heidrich suffered minor injuries and was extradited back to Germany on unknown charges.

Fr. Anderson was expelled from Iraq the very same day, after a historic act of parliament unanimously declared his approach to proselytism "violent extremism." His current whereabouts are unknown.

The tiara went back to D.C. with Agent Smith, who made sure its disappearance was kept secret.

As for me... Fr. Juno, is St. Albert the Great in need of an organist?